A Man's Regret
by VoldemortsNipple
Summary: He had the world and lost everything. Now, the only thing left of him was an emty shell. Not DH compliant. Oneshot.


**I do not own Harry Potter and I don't know why we need to make these stupid disclaimers since we wouldn't be here if we did.**

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"_You are hereby bonded for life. You may now kiss the bride," the Minister of Magic said with a wave of his wand. As Lucius kissed his beautiful new wife, two pristine white ribbons left the Minister's wand and circled around the ballroom until finally wrapping themselves around the bride and groom. An explosion of warmth filled his heart as Narcissa looked up at him, her angelic face glowing in happiness. Family and friends stood up and cheered._

_Now was where his life began._

He stumbled down the path gripping his wand firmly in his hand. The day was so beautiful. There were no clouds in the sky and the warmth from the sun filled everything its shine touched. The world outside was bursting in joy and celebration in the long overdue triumph over darkness. Rock bottom had been hit and the climb had begun. For everybody else that is.

Except Lucius Malfoy.

He was not the same man as before. Everything he had stood for over a month ago was in ashes now. Just like his wife and son.

_He sat next to his crying, panting wife squeezing her hand as she screamed in agony. This was the worst and the best day of his life. Watching his wife in such pain made him sick. But seeing the Healer wipe off his son and hand him to him, wrapped him in a silver colored blanket made his heart swell in love and pride. _

"_Narcissa," he had whispered in excitement. "Look! It's our son! Say hello to Draco," Still panting from exhaustion, Narcissa turned over, seventeen hours of painful labor quickly forgotten. Pale and shakily, she reached out to touch the baby's little bald head. Her face lit up in awe and excitement. Lucius gently handed his wife her new son and watched in fascination as she continued to rub his head. Finally, Narcissa held the baby against her chest, gazing at Lucius in excitement. "He looks like you," She said. Lucius hadn't been able to think of a happier time in his life._

In the very beginning, Narcissa had been afraid of being a mother, while Lucius felt the exact opposite. He had been excited to raise the best child and complete their family.

In the end, Lucius destroyed not only his son, but his wife too. In his quest to provide his family with the best life, he had fallen into a whole too deep for him to climb out of. Not only did he fall into the hole, but he brought his family with him.

"_Daddy!" Draco cried, running into the massive library. Mr. Greengrass fell silent and watched as the four year old jumped into his father's lap. Lucius rubbed the top of his head and grinned. "What is it Draco?" Draco jumped off his father's lap and pointed to the shelf of books behind Mr. Greengrass. "Look what I can do!" The entire shelf of books lifted off of the bookshelf and hovered in the air. Draco pulled his hand back and the books rushed forward. Lucius's heart leapt and the books swirled around Draco. They flowed like a ribbon at the point of Draco's finger through the two men and around the room until they finally settled back on the shelf, surprisingly in the order they had originally been in. Draco grinned at his father, who looked at him with pride. "Well done Draco!" Lucius said with, rubbing his head. When Draco scampered out of the room, Lucius looked at Mr. Greengrass with a grin. "Now that's a wizard! Do you still have doubts about him and Astoria?" Mr. Greengrass had simply laughed. "Well now Lucius, how do you think the Dark Lord will take watching his right hand man's son calling him daddy?"_

The love and affection Lucius had showed his only son had stopped immediately after Mr. Greengrass had left. He had been right. If the Dark Lord had seen such a close relationship, Draco would have been put in the line of danger. Seeing the looks on little Draco's face at his father's rejections broke his heart in the beginning. Soon, it became second nature to him. After all, if Draco felt that earning his father's love meant working hard, he would do it. And Draco did. He did everything he could to earn his father's pride, and despite all of his success, Lucius had been too afraid to show it to him. After Draco was Narcissa.

"_Hello Lucius," Narcissa said, wearing a wispy red nightgown. Her shimmery, platinum blonde hair flowed like a river down her shoulders and her beautiful, porcelain skin glowed like that of an angel. Lucius felt his mouth water at the beauty standing before him holding a bottle of champagne. On the table he was sitting at was a splendid pasta dinner, made by his wife in celebration of his thirty sixth birthday. The dinner had been delicious, but the dessert had been even better. No, not the double chocolate mint cake Narcissa made for special occasions, but Narcissa herself, after Lucius decided that he couldn't take her subtle seduction any longer. He had taken her on the table then and there after she licked the chocolate off of her fork. The feeling of her leg around him and her silky smooth core against him had left its mark on him. He could never forget the last birthday he had spent with his wife, especially when her love for him, despite all of his wrongdoings, had been absorbed into his heart and soul. The most memorable moment of that night had been after their very last intimate encounter, when she had given him a full body massage and spent the entire time telling him how much he was loved._

He had ignored Voldemorts summon that night, deciding that his wife was more important for the first time in years. When Lucius had tried to make up an excuse for Voldemort, he had seen right through it. Narcissa had been brutally tortured in front of him with Draco at his side. While Lucius had stood through it, struggling to keep a straight face, Draco was on his knees in tears. Afterwards, he had Draco carry his unconscious mother back into their bedroom because he had been too afraid to touch her. The entire time, Draco had sobbed and screamed at him for letting this happen to her.

The moment Draco had set Narcissa on the bed, Lucius, in his disgust and frustration at what he had to witness, had taken it out on him by beaten him until he lay broken and bloodied on the floor. The image of Draco struggling to stand up and stumbling out of the room was burned into his mind.

It only went downhill from there. In Lucius's fear of seeing his family hurt, he had pushed them as far away as he could. He had begun the abuse, beating his son every time he did something wrong. He ignored Narcissa and begun hitting her whenever she tried to come close. It destroyed him at first, but he knew it was in their best interest. When the war was over, whatever the outcome was, he had planned on taking them out of the country, somewhere far away to start over.

The regret and disgust he had for himself boiled inside of him. As he reached his destination, the gate to the Malfoy family cemetery, he stopped.

He had been too late.

_He pounded his fist against Draco's bedroom door, yelling for him to come out. Draco was supposed to get the Dark Mark the next day and Lucius had wanted to prepare him for the ceremony. Narcissa pulled on his arm, screaming at him to leave Draco alone. Lucius hadn't listened to him, and proceeded to blow the bedroom door open. Draco was nowhere in sight. "Draco!" Lucius yelled, walking in. Narcissa jumped on his back, hitting and clawing him in the face. "Leave him alone Lucius!" she sobbed. He threw his back against the wall, and Narcissa let go, crying out in pain. Lucius walked to the bathroom and threw open the door. The first thing he saw was the shattered mirror. On the counter was a broken vial of potion._

_On the floor lay Draco, covered in blood. He wasn't breathing._

_Lucius cried out in horror and threw himself at his son, picking him up and slapping him in the face. "Draco! Wake up Draco! Wake up!" he cried. "Nikko!" he yelled. With a loud pop, the house elf arrived and squeaked in shock at the scene before him. "Bring a potion!" he yelled as he shook Draco's body. The elf disappeared and reappeared almost immediately with a violet colored potion in hand. Lucius took it and forced open Draco's mouth. He poured it down his throat and massaged it down. His heart pounded in his chest as Draco suddenly began to vomit a thick, murky brown sludge. Lucius quickly turned him over and slapped his back as he vomited endlessly on the pristine marble floor. With a final cough, Lucius turned him back over just in time to see Draco gaze up at him with bloodshot eyes before losing consciousness. He sighed in relief as he felt his son's breaths and looked up to see Narcissa watching with tears streaming down her face. Suddenly, everything seemed to click._

"_You knew about this?" Lucius cried out in horror. Narcissa had responded by breaking down in sobs._

Draco hadn't wanted to take the Dark Mark. He would have rather died. And he almost did.

And his wife, Draco's very own mother, had supported it.

Lucius opened the gate and slowly walked in, heading to the two graves he had made himself next to the weeping willow.

They were Draco and Narcissa's.

As the numb sickness took over his body, he collapsed to his knees. His calm, cool, collected exterior was gone. Now, the only thing that was left was a broken man. A man who had lost everything he had lived for.

_He hadn't seen his wife or son in nearly three days. It had been two and a half weeks after Draco's brutal self mutilation and attempted suicide. Lucius had delayed Draco's Dark Mark ceremony with the excuse that he had become seriously ill. Voldemort had complied, but not after showing his displeasure with a series of Crucios. Lucius hadn't cared. The Cruciatus was nothing compared to nearly losing his son. It had been his breaking point._

_And now, he was betraying Voldemort. Lucius, the day after Draco's attempted suicide, had contacted the Order. He told them everything he knew and kept them updated every time he talked to a Death Eater or was summoned by Voldemort. He never told Narcissa, nor did he tell Draco. Everything had been tense in the Malfoy Manor and he couldn't muster up the courage to talk about anything. He thought he was doing what was best._

_And Voldemort had found out._

_Lucius had been summoned, and to his horror, his wife and son lay bound at Voldemorts feet._

"_So you decided to betray me?" was all Voldemort said before firing the Cruciatus at Lucius. He didn't even cry out. He couldn't feel anything._

_It was then that the nearly three hours of torture had begun. Curses had been fired at his family, one after another. Unspeakable curses that left them screaming in agony. Curses that mutilated their bodies. Curses that had them vomiting blood. And when Lucius had screamed and rushed forward to protect them, he was stunned by the cheering Death Eaters and had been forced to watch as Voldemort killed his wife and son, little by little. As Voldemort took his time, the surrounding Death Eaters spat at him and beat him around the face._

_Lucius didn't care. He was busy begging Voldemort to end their pain. And he did. By firing a curse that burned their body to ashes from the inside out._

Lucius broke out into sobs and curled up in between the graves he made for the two people that had been his everything.

He had nothing to live for now.

He failed in protecting them. He never gave Narcissa the life or showed her the love she deserved. He never told Draco how proud he was or how much he loved him. He had never been there.

And now he will. He will never leave them again. Lucius pointed his wand to his chest, stabbing it in as hard as he could.

"Avada Kedavra"

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**A/N: A review would be nice =]**


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